Surprised by Things Missed

In spite of the fact I attended a service academy and spent 20 years on active duty, in many ways I held the trappings of military life at arm's length.  In fact, I always considered it somewhat of a compliment when people commented, "You don't seem like a military guy."

The perceived distance between me and my military personna only grew during my last tour.  Teaching at the Naval Academy didn't feel like being in the fleet.  So by the time I submitted my retirement papers I felt like I was more ready than the average fleet guy to tackle the emotional issues associated with making a job transition.

I was wrong. 

Once I traded in my khakis for a polo I realized I missed a lot of things about military life I hadn't considered fully, starting with wearing a uniform.  Things like ribbons, rank insignia, and warfare pins are a roadmap to your accomplishments that tell a tale of sorts to the world.  That roadmap doesn't exist in the civilian world, and that was disorienting at first.  The respect I'd earned from decades of service seemingly evaporated overnight.  And the fact that nobody else was in uniform added to the confusion.

Eventually it all started to make sense, but it took time to get used to a world without salutes, detailers, and even orders.  Try considering having a job for the rest of your life when you've been living two and three years at a time.  It's a scary thought at first.

Life in the military can be a tough act to follow, especially if you've done things you're proud of.  I love my civilian self now, but coming to that feeling wasn't easy.

The bottom line is there's no way to predict how you'll feel as a civilian until you are one.  Just be prepared for the idea you might miss your former life more than you thought you would.

(Submitted by Ward Carroll)

Comments

[tgm]

AMEN. Let me reassure readers that it was the same 23 years ago when I retired. I too, thought myself prepared. I Even had a job and a place to go. The reality was that the day I retired I fell into a depression that lasted three days. Once That was over-I adapted, overcame, and survived quite well.

[TSGTMARC]

Same here Its a hard transition and my wife and myself both had a depression period Good JOBS also after the 24 year military retirement .I came back from Saudi with congestive heart failure & hearing damage . She back back with CHF as well. We were in a daze . Most will survive