The "Real" Rules of the Real World

1. There isn't anyone in charge out here, and those who claim to be don't know what they are doing.
2. There is no such thing as a mission statement.
3. Staff coordination is a battlefield.
4. The paranoids are out to get your job.
5. "Double dipping" is resentment for getting a real retirement when everyone else isn't going to get one anytime soon.
6. Free medical care is an oxymoron.
7. Nobody gives a damn about the time the bad guys almost got your scalp in the Battle of U Dong Do.
8. "Responsible for" on a resume means you sat on your duff while someone else did the job.
9. Seeking out and taking responsibility is poking your nose into what is some one else's turf. Something to indulge in while blaming others is, however, essential to a paycheck continuum.
10. Divide and Conquer is a key management tool and skip the "one for all" bit.

(Submitted by Gordon Fowkes)

Comments

[sherry lucero]

Wow! Bitter much?

What real world is the author operating in?

[Anon]

"What real world is the author operating in?"

The real one, like you said. I worked for a Fortune 500 company for a few months once, and I can personally verify #1, #2, #3, and #10. I wasn't there long enough to verify the others. Better open your eyes, sweetie.

[Ray Burch]

Actually I'm giong to go with Ms. Lucero. You sound extremely bitter. All ten statements make you stand out as a miltary veteran who had unreal expectations of the outside world. Also, it sounds like your personal view of your capabilities exceeded your actual abilities. Your ego is screaming, "I'm so much better than all of you civilians!"

I do agree with #7 and #8. I've found that war stories, while interesting, are time wasters of people who believe that "then" was much more interesting or exciting than "now." The phrase "responsible for" is standard military terminology for "my section/squad/platoon had to get this done." You should use action verbs on a resume to illustrate your participatory role in the event.

Two final comments:
1. Calling anyone "sweetie" in a forum about professional work ethics or environments is completely out of line.

2. Unless your name is "Anon", grow a set and stand up for your opinions and beliefs.

Thank you.